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Among with a plethora of amusing anecdotes about ejaculate and Country women sucking cock, the Mercury Sex Inspectors have dug up some disturbing statistics--including one that says "men are a bunch of no-good louts who refuse to eat pussy or pick up a dish.

Colin Powell say: Does that mean that Portlanders have been obeying the Security Council's orders to "cease and desist" with the oral sex? Can't guess? Let me tell you. Is this the kind of world we want to live in, honored members of the International Security Council? I mean, Country women sucking cock God's sake!

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German men eat more pussy than that! Sorry, Hans. Let's get down to the real nitty-gritty, shall we? It's become increasingly obvious that Country women sucking cock people have been playing games with the Security Council, and those games must stop!

What kind of games?

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Why, poo-poo and hoo-hoo games! While it may appear that Portlanders have been cutting down on intercourse--as they were directed to do by the international community--they are getting around this ruling by sticking things in their poo-poos anuses and hoo-hoos vaginas. What are they doing up there, anyway? They don't have prostates! So unless they're Country women sucking cock for gold, the United States Country women sucking cock the immediate cessation of all butthole noodling.

Unless it's in our buttholes, of course.

Naturally, the only sure cure for sexual intercourse is "prevention. As you will see from the chart below, some things make people hornier than others. And it is these things that must Country women sucking cock stopped in order Country women sucking cock have a more chaste Portland! Portlanders were asked to place a check by every choice that "turned them on. Mercury employees are seasoned professionals who just happen to have a deep scientific interest in blood, fecal matter, and the Olsen Twins.

Am I right? All I'm saying is just think about it How do you really catch a pervert?

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You get inside his or her mind. That's why the Sex Inspectors asked our respondents some deeply personal Country women sucking cock in order to trick them and make them expose themselves for dirty, filthy sluts they are! Apparently it's now "open season" on straight dick. If this doesn't prove my point, nothing will. The city should put this stat in their tourist brochures. Portland, you're a dirty, dirty city.

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Ladies and gentlemen of the Security Council: Any city that would prefer to see two underage twins trussed up nude in a shower to the sweet pure Christian love between a master and his slave, is a very sick city indeed.

We have shown you what we believe is inconvertible Okay, let's say we've shown you "real believable" evidence that Portland is far dirtier than they'd like us to think. And though we could Country women sucking cock rest our case now, we are all too happy to continue kicking a dead horse.

What follows are actual sexual experiences Portlanders have admitted to Country women sucking cock in the year The timid or chaste may want to leave the room. What's the Country women sucking cock thing someone did to you in ?

And to prove these people plan on continuing their offensive behavior Before I die, I swear I'm going to Just that someone would even vote in a contest such as this is deeply sickening. However, as long as we're here, let's find out who won. Rasheed Wallace of the Portland Trailblazers!

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